This page is a gift to you.

Over the last dozen years I have been developing a body of work, which I call the Wheel of Consent®.

Here are a few short videos I made for all the folks who were asking about it and wanted to use it and share it — all 7 hours or so.

The videos are fine, the ideas are fine – but it’s the experience of it that will change you. You have to feel it in your skin.

(Many folks have asked for a printable diagram, so here it is – but it’s still the experience that matters – when your hands get it, you get it.)

I hope you have a great time playing with it.

Thank you, Betty






WANT-TO AND WILLING-TO: What’s the difference and why does it matter?

RECEIVING AND GIVING: Not what you might think!

FOLLOWING THE PLEASURE: What is pleasure and what does it mean to ‘follow’ it?


The Lessons

The Lesson


The geekery behind it ~ what is happening here?



The Lesson


The Taking Role


The Allowing Role


The Lesson


The Receiving Role


The Giving Role





The Wheel of Consent and the 4 quadrants

The dynamic between these two halves


The Receiving Half


The Giving Half



The Doing Half


The Done-to Half




The 4 Quadrants ~ themes, challenges, possibilities, erotic elements, spiritual principles and shadows of each:


Some thoughts on the Taking Quadrant with my friend Harry Faddis, who invented the 3 Minute Game.





FREE DOWNLOAD: The 3-Minute Game (a booklet) and The Wheel of Consent (a 1-page diagram)

BONUS!  A nice long conversation with Harry Faddis, the inventor of the 3-Minute Game